In the past couple of years I've learned a little about attachment parenting theory and apparently unknowingly raised my four with aspects of it.
A bedtime ritual is a part of attachment parenting and I can attest that by fostering a connection with the child you actually make them truly independent. It seems counter productive to actively encourage being attached to you yet it creates a sense of security in them that they can leave you and know you will always be available for them to go back to.
The helicopter parent is right there at the swing, slide, monkey bars ensuring the child doesn't slip or run too fast or use the equipment in a different manner than they think it should be used for. Or is worried that their child will be abducted (stranger abductions are extremely rare in well lit, well supervised & occupied playgrounds). Heliparent is telling their child HOW to climb, HOW to slide, HOW to interact with other children.
Attachment parenting is creating a strong bond with your child that enables them to be independent without any insecurity baggage. Who would you rather marry, someone who loves their parent(s) and can live a part from them, enjoys being with them, or to someone who does family obligations as though it is a form of torture or in order to solicit acknowledgement or praise from the parent(s)? The former is the one who has a deep attachment and has no need to continually seek praise or acknowledgment because they already received it in their early childhood and it has been maintained throughout their life!
Over the next few weeks I'll post ideas on how to foster that deep relationship.